And thus the much anticipated testimony of Jason begins. Ok, ok. So no one really wants to read this but I wrote this anyway because we really need some content on the webpage [a reference to the voices]. As my writing is superfluous, this will be incredibly long. So here we go.

Our story begins in the mythical suburban land of RB, where flowers grow, birds sing, and people scream thug life from their lowered civics. Our awkward hero, Jason Sato, lives a confused life in this haven for silly monkeys and smelly koalas...

So anyway, my church experiences began at a young age. My family and I attended a Japanese church far far away from our home. My brother and I did not know the other kids in youth service, and thus our experiences were not thoroughly enjoyable. At the early ages of nine and eleven, we whined until we did not have to go to church anymore. Our sister, only three or so at the time, was the only one of us who seemed to enjoy it. As our incessant whining was mind-numbing, we succeeded in our goal, and we were allowed to stay home Sunday mornings.

As time went on, I eventually got to the joy that is middle school. If you didn’t catch my sarcasm, middle school was my equivalent to hell. While at the time I didn’t realize it, my day was constant torment from my loving peers. Being the short guy sucks. Actually just being noticeably different in any way sucks in middle school. People are mean. Actually, I was mean to people too out of retaliation or something I’m guessing. But that’s not the point. In middle school, I developed my theory that people are dumb. I still hold to it. I also developed my tendency to be extremely sarcastic.

I entered high school as a bitter young man, yearning for popularity and the Asian gangster status. The last sentence is at least half true. I can’t really tell anymore. Throughout this extended period of time in my life, the thought of God and religion had not really even entered my mind. This changed somewhere around sophomore year. My approach to religion went from not thinking about it to thinking badly of it. My friends introduced me to high-minded ideas of truth, justice, and equality. I somehow came to the conclusion that God is simply a pipe dream and Christianity is pure evil in its hypocrisy and stupidity. Without researching or even asking anyone with actual knowledge, I believed that religion was a way to enslave the weak minded and was detrimental to true morality. However, some way or another, I also accepted the existence of God. My deist philosophy included a really good and nice God that simply lets the world run its course. Once again, my apparent knowledge of the workings of this world were based on nothing but air.

As time progressed I was blessed with friends such as Roy Won and Henry Chi. Roy’s form of evangelism was appealing. He didn’t badger me constantly or even try to contradict my opinions. He simply asked what they were and invited me occasionally to Friday service. I went every once in awhile, considering it to be an educational experience. Henry and I went to Calvary together as more or less nonbelievers during 1999. Initially, Calvary was quite scary with people screaming and randomly fainting. Anyhow, Henry ended up becoming quite involved in church. I was unaffected and became disinterested with the church idea as a whole.

Somewhere during junior year, I became desensitized. After hearing so many dismal stories of abuse amongst friends and atrocities in world history, I had lost my empathetic powers. Along with them, I lost the ability to feel truly happy. My emotions were smothered by apathy, cynicism, and despair. To be honest, there were times when I wondered if I could feel anything at all. I ceased almost all outward emotions while I was equally dead inside. Suicide never entered my mind. Still, life was a bore. I had no direction, no meaning, no purpose. I was the definition of a lost youth.

Nonetheless, I plodded onward towards some unforeseeable goal. At some point in February 2000, I somehow managed to get a girlfriend. Don’t ask me how. I still think it was a cosmic joke. The details are irrelevant to my testimony. Anyway, this relationship ended relatively quickly, leaving me rather empty for a little while. I ended up realizing how inept I was at expressing my feelings and at even being able to discern them myself. My apathy and lack of feeling altogether resulted in conflicts with my parents. My grades slipped to straight C’s for a brief period of time. I was quiet, yet hot-tempered. My parents thought I was on drugs. Instead I was just depressed by the apparent futility of life.

Meanwhile, I had distanced myself from my friend who had introduced those high-minded concepts of truth and justice. I ended up spending even more time than I did before with my wonderful associates, Roy, Henry, and Paul. Eventually, I forget how, why or when, but that loveable character, Jon Boiser, decided to attend Calvary Friday service to see what it was like. As I had nothing better to do, I decided to attend as well.

During the period between April and fall 2000, I held the belief that another girlfriend would provide me with the sustenance I needed. I had not given up on the hope of satisfaction in pretty girls, nice stuff, and lots of people thinking I'm really cool. I ended up figuring that such things were frivolous and rather immature. Quite frankly, that didn't really stop me from being frivolous and immature but that's irrelevant I suppose. Thus, with no visible source of meaning or happiness, I began my attendance to Calvary once again in late fall of 2000.

Along the way, I broke free from my earlier qualms with Christianity. Without reading the Bible, I assumed it was false and contradictory. Without studying the religion, I assumed that Christianity was about self-righteous hypocrites. The sad fact is that Christians often do not reflect the grace and blessing which has been bestowed upon them. However, once I ignored the Christians and focused on Jesus Christ, I found beautiful doctrines of peace, love, and brotherhood. I was immediately drawn to Jesus's message which appealed to my earlier created sense of truth and justice. As I had earlier affirmed my belief in God, Jesus became a wonderful creation of God, but not a deity in Himself. I found in both God and Jesus, something that is worthy to be praised. I figured my earlier disagreements with organized religion would stand, and I would just become a lover of the great teacher Jesus and the loving yet absent God. However I was obviously wrong. As I continued listening to sermons and opening my heart, I quickly learned that Jesus is God and God is truly alive and working amongst this world. Somehow I managed to go from a deist denouncing Christianity to a believer. God works wonders on people who don’t deserve it.

I don’t remember when, but I just recall singing during worship at Calvary’s Friday service and realizing that I had become a Christian. I attribute my conversion mainly to the fact that I had honestly and truly sought to find out if Jesus was the truth, rather than dismissing every Christian argument as mere lies. Apologetics helped me see that Christianity has a crazy amount of reason behind it. This is why I strive to educate myself and others about our religion. It is of utmost importance if we are to ever expect the many intellectuals and atheists/deists to truly consider the truth that is Christ. In the end, I can't really explain to anyone why I converted. Apologetics opened my mind a bit. But nothing besides God's grace can be a sufficient explanation.

*I really can't believe that I forgot to mention this, but I was thinking about my conversion today and I realized that even before I was Christian, before I knew if God existed, I prayed every time I came to church. And I can't believe I left out such a powerful contribution to my conversion. I began my prayers talking to someone I didn't know was even there, explaining how I couldn't be Christian due to certain disagreements with the church, etc. I tried to convince Him and perhaps myself that I was doing my best to live a good life but that I couldn't become Christian because of various reasons. I suppose it sounds odd. But yea. Everytime it was time to pray, I prayed. And I really did ask God for blessings upon my friends and the people that I met at Calvary. And eventually, I suppose I began praying for truth and for the world to be changed for the good. I didn't care how. Just the end result. Eventually I suppose I found out that the how would be through the blood of Jesus Christ and the grace of God. But yea, earnest prayer, seeking the truth works. God answers when you call out to Him. So if you're unsure of your faith or just trying to figure out what the truth is amongst the many different choices laid out before you, pray to God that He would allow you to see the truth. Honestly seek after God in Jesus' name and you shall know the truth. (edited 10/6/01)*

I can’t pinpoint the day, but it was quite recently that I accepted Jesus as my Lord and Savior. In early January 2001 or possible late December 2000, God worked wonders upon me. As I write this, my conversion occurred at most a month or so ago. Yet it seems so very long ago. So much has changed since then....

I may not have been saved from crazy awful circumstances. I may not have been converted in some crazy and exciting way. By simply living my life as a more or less average teenager, I was blessed by grace when I sought Him. I wouldn’t have it any other way. Some people think that the weak turn to Christ in times of great trouble because they need the psychological comfort. I could say the same for atheism but that’s not the point. Others claim that religion is for those lacking intellectual capacity. I prove that wrong as I’m crazy smart (j/k, Jon is crazy smart though). I was not in complete disarray and suicidal. But I still turned to Jesus. Thus, His love can be recognized by anyone.

God’s blessings in my life are more apparent every day. I see His work everywhere and I wonder how I could pass up such obvious signs. God has blessed me with a burning desire to seek Him. He’s performed miracles in the lives of my friends on a daily basis and continues to do so. I can never give him enough praise and I would never want to stop anyway. God is love, guys. Let’s share him with the world.

*It's strange how simple this all looks. I look back on the past two years and I honestly cannot imagine my life having been altered so much in any other time. My testimony is inadequate to really voice how I felt or what happened. But in a nutshell, I spit on the Son of God and He picked me up and brought me home.

Some will say that I was simply weak and I chose the easy way out of believing. They are half right. I have found that I am weak. Christianity IS the religion for the pathetic, powerless, poor, and weak. The only thing that no one seems to understand is that every human being is this way. However, I did not choose. My faith is genuinely a gift from God because I can say without any doubt that if it were left up to me, I would still be clinging to my irrational logic and my sin. God opened my eyes so that I could see the truth.

I was the least likely of persons to be converted. I was considered the most cynical person anyone knew by at least 30 different people. I dismissed and ridiculed any idea resembling religion (though I suppose I never realized that refusing to believe anything close to Christianity is actually an act of faith). My emotions were severely dulled by apathy, bitterness, and sorrow. But God is gracious in giving to people who do not deserve it.

The best reason to believe in Christianity is not because it makes you feel warm and fuzzy, not because it has the best arguments behind it, and not because it is the religion of choice in this corrupted world.

Believe because it is true.

The only way we can believe is by the grace of God. We believe because God has opened our eyes. We do not open our eyes by believing. How can I believe a truth that I cannot see due to my blindness and the fact that I'm dead? I simply cannot take credit for my supposed "choice". I did not find Jesus. Jesus found me, a stupid sheep that had wandered quite a distance astray.

God has the power and the will to save the most unlikely of people.

Take heart and trust that our hope shall never fail us. (edited 7/29/02)

articles